So I went down to the Freedom Fair on Ruston on the Fourth of July during the day. What a crowd. I was simultaneously sorry I didn't bring a camera and glad I wouldn't have to worry about losing it in the crush of people.
As a Philly girl and civics nerd, I am perpetually disappointed by Freedom Fairs that do not feature a Benjamin Franklin reenactor or, in any case, pay tribute to our forefathers and their incredible wisdom and bravery in creating both the Declaration of Independence, the best breakup letter ever written, and the Constitution. Most celebrations are not unlike the Freedom Fair, gauche fair food for miles and stupid trinkets for sale like rip-off beanie babies and Ren Faire-style clothes. Freedom to stuff our faces and bloat out and buy clutter and shake our fat bellies like we're seductive, that's what the FF was all about.
And there were fat bellies. To the FF's credit, there was markedly less camel toe than at the Gig Harbor Maritime Gig. At least on this side of the bridge women are more inclined to wear clothes that fit. Not that they are necessarily good clothes. I saw one enormous woman in an unfortunate skin-tight tank top with an very very skinny T-back that showed an expansive tattoo of birds and flowers and skulls across her upper haunches, for example, and a man with a shirt that said, "If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong," which I just found unnecessarily arrogant and abrasive.
Perhaps the oddest shirt I saw was not being worn but was for sale, printed with an old tinotype of a Native American with a shotgun that said "The Original Homeland Security: Fighting Terrorism since 1492." I just wondered if the vendor had any idea how that sentiment went along with 7/4.
Tacoma gets some pretty crappy vendors. The air show was pretty cool, though it got loud when the fighter planes came out from McChord and I turned around for home. The most interesting set up was a drum circle with additional drums so anyone can join in. Tacoma is not exactly Seattle when it comes to drum circle enthusiasm. Which is kind of cute when you see a couple of hippie types playing while little kids who are not theirs join in. But it seemed that the drum circle instigators were aware that Tacoma is not, indeed, a Seattle-esque city because they had a sign on some nice posterboard with multi-colored shiny paste-on letters that said, "TACOMA IS A PRAYING CITY." That cracked me up. Another sign, in marker this time, said, "STAY in SCHOOL," a message I found to be at odds with the typical drum circler lifestyle.
The plan was to go to the McMillans for their annual Fourth blowout. I was a little sweaty from walking about six miles, but I figured I was okay, I whipped up a Mrs. Cole's Congealed Salad (aka white trash salad: mix one container cottage cheese with one container Cool Whip, a drained can of crushed pineapple, a big handful of walnuts or pecans and a package of red Jell-o and keep cool) and headed out for the Key Peninsula in remarkably light traffic.
Well, that insured that I missed the riots that broke out later. And CNN, the Discovery Channel and USA Today have all called Freedom Fair one of the best tourist draws for family activity in the U.S. What. Ever. Seriously, scroll down on that first link.
"Police got reports about 9 p.m. of fights involving 150 to 200 people near Jack Hyde Park. Surrounding the fights were a couple of thousand people," reported the TNT. I figure they had had enough Andean music. How many times can a person listen to "El Condor Pasa" and "Llorando Se Fue," anyhow? Criminy that stuff was playing when I got there and when I left more than an hour later at Hyde Park. And I say this as a fan of Andean tunes.
Hugh's was calm until Cameron started setting off fireworks and one of the festival balls blew up in the container after failing to pop into the air. Good times.
So today I went to the library to return some books and as I was walking back heard a commotion from Wright Park. Apparently it was Out at the Park day, which I never would have known was going on if I relied on the entertainment section of my local daily.
Again, missing my camera. All the local drag queens were there, most of them looking hott. There's this one older DQ who wears a trashy take off on a poodle skirt and lace collared shirt ensemble, I have seen him before. But not the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, who give away condoms and popsicles. They were awesome, with their habits and fake eyelashes tipped with beads. I also liked the Dockyard Dames booth, a roller derby team I briefly considered joining but didn't want to drive to Lakewood for. But there were more social service booths than anything and they're kind of boring.
No fights, though.
I swear as I left I heard a guy say, "The best thing is people can't tell when I'm drunk because I have Cerebral Palsy," but I could have been wrong because, well, he had Cerebral Palsy.
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