Weird restaurant

I just had to say, briefly, that Ray and I tried out a restaurant so eccentric it deserves its own post. I will call it "Numcat's Lair" to preserve its anonymity, since I may be tempted to cross into territory that will offend someone and I don't want any trouble here.

We'd been curious about this place, as once before we'd tried to just walk in (at about 6:45ish) and were turned away, even though there were customers and the restaurant was quite empty. First thing about the Numcat's Lair, you have to have a reservation.

The reasons for the mandatory reservation was soon apparent. There is only one server and maybe two cooks (chef/sous chef or chef/prep cook, it's hard to say) in the place. That means they need airtight table times. But it means the Lair will never be more than half full. It has two, whole, massively decorated rooms with booths and tables. The booths had a Soviet kind of comfort to them.

So we got there at 5:30 and there was only one special left. What kind of restaurant only has a single special left that early on? We were curious. Also, how could the menu (expensive) support such a variety of meats and foodstuffs if a maximum of about 10 tables — mostly two-tops — could be filled each night? The mystery deepened.

Then the food arrived. I had ahi, which was cooked down to canned tuna quality. I was, frankly, shocked. Well done ahi is a culinary sin that is, in religious terms, mortal in nature. This isn't the sort of thing that bothers Ray, who had salmon that didn't seem to be too overdone. The ahi was sort of dry, as a result, and had been drenched in a lemon basil sauce that was composed with a great deal of garlic and olive oil to compensate. The vegetables served with were good, though the rice was old people's rice like you get in a lesser eating place — no grain sticks to other grains, and there's an overcooked orzo quality to it.

We had dessert. There were three options, two of which involved chocolate mousse. We got the mousse in a chocolate pyramid. Ray said, "This is so good," but I really wonder at his ability to taste. I just found out he's kind of colorblind, and the grainy, greasy texture of the mousse was pretty bad. Ray clarified: "It's sweet, you know, it has sugar in it." Well, true enough. Inside the pyramid (interesting, 80sish presentation) was not only the mousse, but some sort of bolus of ... cheesecake? Another poorly-constructed mousse? I wasn't sure. It was sour-ish. Tart is a word I'd use had it tasted good. It was just sour. I did something ridiculous, I have to say. Both of us had had bites of this bolus, but I wanted to spare Ray from eating any more of this awful stuff, so I ate it. I was like Tinkerbell taking Peter Pan's poison. It put a foul taste in my mouth water could not get out.

Oh, Numcat's Lair, that was one of the strangest meals I've eaten. It would just be mediocre-to-disappointing food that flauted good culinary sense if it hadn't been for the insane atmosphere.

I can't wait to go back.