I know, I know. Science. It's impartial. The studies are double-blind (well, the one the NYT's John Tierney and David Brooks have lauded in their latest columns). And for years, science has dictated that those who are not overweight live longest and healthiest.
Of course, as everyone in the whole western world knows by now, a little pudge is good for you. You would expect that the Journal of the American Medical Association's article about a study that showed that people who are a tad overweight (not obese!) tend to outlive not only thier teensy-waisted friends but their "normal"-weight friends would set off some cheering from the flabby pundit class. But you probably wouldn't expect it to blame "liberals" for being down on fat.
To quote Tierney:
"We could denounce the dangerous role models provided by the zero-body-fat actresses on 'Desperate Housewives,' or go to Vogue's offices for an intervention with its social X-ray of an editor, Anna Wintour."
and
"The activists fighting the evil junk-food industry always had a streak of neo-puritanism in them. They cited scientific research to justify their battle against fatty foods, but then campaigned hysterically against Olestra, the calorie-free fat substitute."
and
"The supposedly deadly consequences of fat provided the scientific rationale for the last politically correct form of prejudice."
There's a stab at blue-state entertainment culture, a stab at consumer activists and a stab at how certain people want to be politically correct but just have to lord it over people who don't measure up.
Hello? Have you not heard of Michael Moore? Did you not know about Clinton's pre-heart surgery diet? Would you call Andrea Dworkin, rest her soul, supermodel material?
As for David Brooks, who is really beneath contempt anyway, check this out:
"Mother Nature - unlike Ivy League admissions committees - doesn't like suck-ups."
"[Mother Nature] doesn't like those health-conscious rice cake addicts you see at Manhattan restaurants ordering a skinned olive for lunch and sitting there looking trim and fit in their tapered blouses while their buns of steel leave permanent dents in the upholstery."
"I like to be reminded that the universe is basically crooked. This is what the zero-tolerance brigades and all the better living gurus never quite get."
Oh, for the love of Pete, you live in NYC, don't you know the latest diet food there is low-carb, the exact opposite food from the disco-era rice cake? And why point out Manhattan? There are health freaks in Houston, Texas, the fattest city in the U.S., and, hence, probably the planet.
Yes, the people who told you to work out and eat your veggies were total jerk commies who wanted you not only to suffer but to feel bad about yourself. God knows there isn't an unsympathetic jerk like a health care worker (that was said with sarcasm), or that those people who don't want you to put potentially dangerous chemicals in your body only want to strip you of the joy of consumption.
No people, go to the mall and enjoy your freedom. Hit Applebee's and skip the salad for fries. Feel good about yourself at all cost. The people who want you to be responsible for your health are vicious pitbulls who want you to pay attention to what is bothersome about your weight and your consumption and the environment your food is produced in. And if you read Eric Schlosser, you will be darn sure that you might not feel so good about your ignorance.
It's science, dudes. It is what it is and the scientific and medical communities have been working with what they had, which, as you should have noticed by now, changes every ten years in a revolutionary fashion.
And would someone tell me why it is that conservatives love to point out how liberals are both controlling the populace by making them feel inferior and inhibited while simultaneously complaining how liberals are controlling the media with programming that encourages us to engage in violent and sexual behaviors, and have shackled us to an educational system that makes kids into egomaniacs because they have been imbued with self-esteem from the git-go? I thought the blue states were all about decadence and pampering?
You can't have it both ways.
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